A Joke

[Richard230]

Since things are a little slow around here, at least until Victory decides to introduce their replacement for, or upgrade to, the Empulse, I thought I would post a cute (and hopefully inoffensive) joke to keep you entertained today:

The Perfect Employee?

1 Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
2 hard at work at his desk. He works independently, without
3 wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
4 thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and always
5 finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended
6 measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
7 breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
8 vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
9 knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
10 classed as an asset employee, the type which cannot be
11 dispensed with. Consequently, I recommend that Bob be
12 promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
13 executed as soon as possible.

Addendum:

That idiot was standing over my shoulder while I wrote the report sent to you earlier today. Kindly re-read only the odd numbered lines.

[Brammofan]

Ha!  Thanks for this.
I'm hopeful that things will pick up soon.

[Consultec]

Funny.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Richard230]

Today we have a little golf humor from a Caddie....   

Golfer: "If you were me, how would you have played that last shot?"
Caddie: "Under an assumed name."

Golfer: "I don't know what's wrong. This is the worst I've ever played."
Caddie: "So you've played before, have you?"

Golfer: "I'm going to drown myself in the lake."
Caddie: "Do you think you can keep your head down long enough?"

Golfer: "This is the worst golf course I've ever played on."
Caddie: "This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour ago."

Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddie in the world."
Caddie: "I don't think so. That would be too much of a coincidence."

Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a five iron?"
Caddie: "Eventually."

Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on a Sunday?"
Caddie: "The way you play, it's a sin any day."

Golfer: "How do you like my game?"
Caddie: "Very well, but personally I prefer golf."

Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course."
Caddie: "Try heaven. You've already moved most of the earth."

Golfer: "Will you stop looking at your watch all the time? It's distracting me."
Caddie: "It's not a watch, it's a compass."